A week alone reminds columnist Doug Mendenhall of how Christians should be helping each other. (AP/Michael Switzer)ABILENE, Texas -- My wife left me.
Don't cry; she's coming back. She said so Monday morning, a few hours before I wrote this, as she loaded up a van full of kids bound for a week of summer camp. She may even be home before you read this. It's not the first time we've been apart for a week, but it's not a regular thing, and we don't enjoy it.
Writing this just a few hours after she left, I can predict what will happen while she's gone. I will start off with good intentions, to get the house in order, to keep it that way, to tackle some handyman stuff that's been piling up.
I know my resolve will quickly evaporate, and instead I'll watch too much late-night TV, most of it stuff I've seen before. I know I'll eat more junk than if she were here. I know I will sleep later. I know I'll have to scramble to clean up at the last minute before she returns.
I am not alone in this sort of creeping decrepitude - I suspect a lot of spouses are guilty of it when their other halves are out of town for a while. Men more than women, I suppose. It isn't a horrible problem. I am not heading for Vegas or chatting naughtily with babes online or plotting the overthrow of the government.
Still, the truth I must face is that I am a less responsible, less productive person without my mate. She is not a nag, nor does she lead me to believe that she's disappointed in what I do or don't do. It's just that we love each other, and so bring out the best in each other. She'd tell you the same thing, if she weren't holed up in a cabin, surrounded by Smurfs and Munchkins.
Let's call this the principle of solitary slippage.
The principle goes far beyond marriages. The best non-spousal example are the networks built among individual Christians.
This is worth pondering, because I hear from a lot of individual Christians who say that while they believe in the saving power of Jesus, they prefer to pursue him solo - without the meddling they feel is certain to result if they walk into a church building or even cobble together a few faith-filled friends to keep them on the right path.
True, there are believers with whom I would be foolish to seek a close relationship, for they would quickly nibble away at the cords that bind me to God. But quite simply, a Christian alone is not achieving the potential envisioned by Christ. The little epistle of Ephesians has a lot to say about this, but this verse seems to sum it up: "(T)he whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work."
This is a simple but crucial part of the faith.
Plus, it explains why Smurfs and Munchkins are so cheerful: You rarely see one alone.
Former Times design editor Doug Mendenhall, who now teaches journalism at Abilene Christian University, has written Soul Food weekly since 2000. E-mail him at doug.mendenhall@acu.edu.